- Mon Apr 25, 2016 1:24:51 am
#1001
Okay, so final 14 now. Making progress slowly but surely. Still kind of feels like there's a shit ton of people left given how much people have already given to the game. I thought that was really cool that we've all made it to every challenge for the first time in Stranded history or whatever you said (besides I guess new Shirin), and that's a cool stat. A lot of us have almost missed comps but no one has and it's made for a really active game.
Hmm, so I've settled down from earlier now that everyone KNOWS I was telling the truth. Maybe they view my ignoring the clue as arrogance, I viewed it as confidence and hopefully loyalty. I wish I could say it was some super strategic thing but in all actuality I had no interest in hunting for the idol out of sheer laziness. Some circumstances have changed though, Joaq has done what sounds like a reasonably good job in narrowing things down using Max's 3rd and final clue and apparently there's something to do with red, green and blue lakes. I could be looking for it right now. Instead I'm posting in my confessional. Even though just a couple hours ago I thought I was about to be blindsided. Is that stupid?
I don't know, I hope not. I feel like this is a marathon, not a sprint. Finding idols and doing well in challenges are things I'd like to think that I have the skill to avoid needing, and the truth is... and I know this sounds kind of obnoxious because on paper you should use everything you have at your disposal within the rules to help you in a game, but games that require idols or challenges are just not that impressive to me. I'd vote for a mediocre player over a good player who was so OTT and brazen that they NEEDED to rely on those things and couldn't get by otherwise. If I find out after the game that I was the one slated to go home tonight, I will view my game as a total joke regardless of how far I make it. In order to play a truly good game to my eye, you need to minimize necessary luck insanely, and either win or get REALLY screwed in a way that was not within your reasonable control, which is almost never. Of course that sure as hell isn't going to stop me from doing my damndest to make sure I win.
Hopefully if that is the case, it can be viewed by some other players close to me as something that proves I'm very fallible and a no-doubt black mark on my resume if I did match up with them at FTC. I want to subtly begin stoking that "beatable image" fire like yesterday. Easier said than done though. Convincing people of things via posts and messages online is very fucking difficult. The Survivor ORG social game is a straight up balancing act that's difficult as hell; it's so hard to weigh game talk and personal talk and long messages and short messages and just keep spinning disks and making people comfortable and all this other crap you gotta factor in. Then throw in idols and all this other stuff. Not easy. But fun as hell to try!
Random thought but I can't help but wonder if Max has the idol and that's why he felt so comfortable spilling it to everyone to "curry favor". Ugh... I just know I'm the one they'll split the vote on if it comes to it. How do I get myself out of this mediocre spot... maybe I
want a swap? Eh.
The four people that have been voted out so far all have one thing in common... I've never spoken to any of them. Four boots in and I still haven't interacted with anyone in Loser's Lodge. Hopefully that won't be changing soon.
I have a relationship of some kind with everyone left other than Drew and Reed, and I'd like to think that even in spite of everything, if Kelly wanted to pry SOMEBODY other than Max over to old Asmat, it would be me, and hopefully I could make that transition seamlessly if it ever came to it. Dan, for all the good things he appears to have achieved at new Yali, still is on the rocks with a LOT of people in this game. Good short-term positioning comes at a price sometimes.
Has the topic of a swap/merge been on anyones minds? How do you think you have been playing thus far and do you think that your style of play would lend itself to a win or will you ahve to change that up in the next phase of the game? Are you happy with how the swap has gone and the outcome so far at Asmat? Who on Asmat are you currently afraid of?
Answering in order. So many rumors swirling still... will there be more swaps? F12/F10 merge? Mutiny opportunities which I'm still expecting could happen prior to tomorrow? F2/F3? And I think these are things most everyone is thinking about. I was able to outshine Max tonight in the challenge by a decent amount, which makes me feel about two millimeters better than I did beforehand. So IDK if I need a swap right now, but I know I don't feel "secure" if this is my long-term home until merge. So yeah we've thought about it a ton.
My style of play should lend itself to a win
because I plan to change it in the next phase(s) of the game. My game by the end, if things go as planned, could look reasonably consistent throughout. Trying to fly somewhat under the radar early in order to hopefully become underestimated and shrugged off down the line, before really starting to dominate in the home stretch. Now that's the idea, making it happen is really hard. There's no set formula for it or anything, it's just my general framework for how I want things to go. One of the reasons I was so angry to have suspected that I may go home tonight is because part of my pitch is going to be about remaining in the middle all game and never being on the "shortlist" of boot targets. That plan takes a huge hit and I could risk looking really foolish if I try to claim that and it ends up not being the case. I want to seem like a played a complete and strategic game from day 1 to the end of the game, with special emphasis on mid to late jury. So I guess right now no, at THIS moment my style is not conducive to a win. But I think that fact could help make me more of a threat for later.
I don't love the way the swap ended up, naturally. I can't tell if these people like me. Dale is pissing me off and I can't put my finger on why. Maybe it's the fact that he effectively accused me of being a liar three times already that I can count. That might have something to do with it. Nadiya at first I was furious with when I thought she was framing me and was preparing a last-minute callout speech to have queued up if I were to be booted tomorrow night, but then she found out I was telling the truth and it probably worked out best for me anyways since now no one will fucking
DARE try to frame me as a liar for the clue shit. I hope.
Joaq gives me a billion reasons to trust him and I still don't. Could be my paranoia. That seems to be a common theme in a lot of my doubts with this tribe, doesn't it? Dan I really want to work with far into the game, he's just such a great player who doesn't bullshit a drop more than necessary. Fun as hell to work with too, I hope he isn't playing me. Max... fuck, I just don't know man. I just don't know. I can't tell because I just don't talk to him enough. Jaclyn I'm meh on, and she is certainly the player on Yali I know the least about. She kind of got screwed over by her work schedule but even aside from that she's not overly substantive in what she's saying, which is likely by design. She's the kind of player that won't win because there's no way in fuck she has a secret warm and fuzzy side that's gonna make her rack up jury votes. I've deduced that from a mere 8 messages, if that, and so it's settled.
Val I like but much like the others, she doesn't like to talk much game. The only thing they've said to me is Max Max Max. That's fine with me but what if they use Max, or even Joaq or Dan, against me? I've come to realize just typing out these rants that I have some spookily narcissistic traits. A round that so obviously should not be about me, I manage to get myself in a crazy spot where I think it's about me. Paranoia is so GOOD though, and I know NO OTHER way to play. Keeps you grounded in a sense, you never get too big for your britches. You can't be blindsided going about the game my way, that's for sure.
Asmats I fear on their own? Maybe Drew and Reed, if that. I know what most of them are about. They were never particularly subtle with me. Kelly in particular truly showed me her colors very early on in the game. I get it: no one wants to lock themselves into a game's worth of working with people just based on a first-night alliance borne of self-preservation and a couple of opening paragraphs of first impressions. And so she had guts, she really did. She straight up broke the alliance with no shame, but the way she went about it seemed a little wishy-washy to me, though I know it's not easy to pull off from experience.
But the fact that she did it showed me how willing she was to discard allies in favor of people she likes better, which is in many ways admirable, but scary in others, since I KNOW that the more we talk, the more she'll realize how much she likes So and company better than me. I'm not exactly sure how I would handle things if I met back up with her and her crew, but if it's in the right situation I would work with her again. Players like Kelly and Dan really make ORGs fun to play.
So, I don't fear all that much. She used the idol and apparently everyone in the game knows that by now, with the only exceptions likely being Drew and Reed if anyone. Kelly could be rightfully viewed as the queenpin over there and I really hope she somehow can stick around until mid-merge so I can still keep the door open to capitalize on her OBVIOUS, NEVER-ENDING quest for blood and determined attitude that I spoke about at length a few episodes back. I have a hunch that if she makes it to the end, she will backstab like everyone on the jury to get there and not think twice. If I had a "fan favorite" vote, she or Dan would get mine hands down. They have pretty big personalities and are both kind of lovable. By far the two players whose presences have shaped my game the most to this point. Dale maybe a distant third, lot of good characters this season which is something I feel like I haven't paid much attention to but it's true.
